travelers 01

“I am not Mother!” The words slipped off of her tongue and through her lips like velvet. “I am not mother.” 
It was an affirmation. Something that she should have said a very long time ago, but never found the courage. It had sat in the pit of her heart like a bag of wet sand dragging her down, but in that moment she freed herself. She looked out in the night and the darkness swallowed the words, chewed them up, found they were too big and spat them back out to her in echoes. Even the universe agreed. Just like that an itch had been scratched. The little teapot, short and stout, finally tipped over and was emptied out. Relief flowed through her veins. She was not mother. And…that should be alright.

She walked away from Lysandra. Her teeth chattered, but it wasn’t from the cold air. All over again, she was the eight year old who needed to bite her nails, lest she took a bite out of someone else. Once that was out, there was no telling what other things would follow. She feared they might be nasty and if it ever got to that point, there would be no return, because Lysandra did not mince words to make a pie easier to swallow either. Especially when it was about mother. Ivy Red knew she wasn’t even half as good as any of the stories of her mother boasted. It was a fact that Lysandra was adamant to never let her forget. Her mother had come into her powers at a much earlier age and the things she had accomplished, Ivy Red could only dream of doing. And you know what they say about dreamers…all the dreamers in the world are dizzy in the noodle. She wasn’t entirely sure she knew what that meant, but Perry—A freckled face, green eyed boy in her astronomy class had said that to her one day, before he launched himself into outer-space and into oblivion. She thought of Perry now and of how odd that she did. How very odd that she frequently did. Perhaps she wouldn’t lose herself in the oblivion of outer-space like that freckled face boy. But for sure, she was lost in her mother’s shadow, and wasn’t it sort of the same thing? Lost was lost, regardless of how you went about the losing.

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